It’s not always easy

It’s not always easy,  easy to wake up when your just not sure if you want to wake up.. It’s not easy to pull out your strength when really you just want to cry, and cry. For no reason at all. If it’s not crying then its anger. That feeling were you just have all this built up anger sitting at the bottom pit of your stomach, and little by little it begins to climb up through each level inside your body, sometimes it stays there for weeks, taking up residence were ever it pleases. Sometimes anger gets out of hand and decides to through a party and invite anxiety, depression, procrastination, of course once they arrive they don’t leave, not quite yet anyways… not until your mind is racing about a million things yet you can’t even have the energy to do one of them. You know you need to and you should, yet you can’t. And you tell yourself, over and over again that you can’t. You can’t. You can’t. Is it fear? Fear of succeeding? Fear of fighting the great fight and actually beating it. It’s not easy… It’s not easy fighting when giving up is so much better to do… And you tell yourself every time anger invites anxiety, depression and procrastination that this time it’ll be better, this time the party ends early and out they come, this time it’ll be different. But it never is, is it? It’s not always easy… but then again, why would it be?